Living Authentically!

I was not a PK (preacher's kid) or an MK (missionary's kid), titles that a kid could be proud of, but I was at the bottom of the social hierarchy for the first time in my life - a CK (criminal's kid).

There are lots of CK's in the Bible, but I wanted to learn from the ones who were God followers. Those who helped their communities arrive at a solution to their problems, instead of those CK's who added to their communities problems. I knew that if they were able to help others, then they must have arrived at a healthy state of mind about themselves regardless of being labeled a CK. In my studies, I came across Malchishua and Abinadab, sons of King Saul. Both of these CK's added to others' problems. However, King Saul's other son, Jonathan, helped his community. Specifically, he helped his best friend/brother-in-law, David (who was on Israel's Most Wanted List) stay alive. David had been mislabeled by King Saul as a very dangerous person, so he became a fugitive in hiding. Although I could not relate to certain aspects of Jonathan's story (which is found in chapters 13-20, 23, and 3 of I Samuel, and in the 1st chapter of II  Samuel) these aspects of his life were now very relatable to me...

Like me,

-He was so shocked to see the change in his dad. (His earthly father drastically changed from being Israel's Godly king to a serial killer. My earthly father drastically changed from being a Christian, conservative politician to a serial thief.)

-He was now under the heaviness of the dirty, physical label - CK (criminal's kid).

-He had to move past the impossible situation of shame and embarassment of his earthly father's destructive acts towards others.

-He would have to do the hard thing of choosing sides - Heavenly Father or earthly father.

Finding another CK in the Bible that was helping his community was the first way in which I felt my Heavenly Father's invisible embraces. This is when I discovered that my Heavenly Father is very relatable by showing us a myriad of stories in the Bible that can bring us solutions to our everyday problems. 

For the first time, I felt hope. This hope was given to me initially when I was a third-grader, when I chose to start a Spiritual relationship with my Heavenly Father. This is when He gifted me my personal, tailor-made Garment of Praise. This is not a physical garment but a spiritual garment. It is a different way of thinking. It is not common sense, or a physical thinking mindset, but a spiritual one.This different kind of thinking is unconventional and unique, but we don't hear a lot about it. This kind of thinking allows for us to have hope again. By reading His Word, He keeps growing our spiritual thinking mindset. I would not start tapping into this Spiritual thinking mindset until I was in a desperate situation - a 7-year-long (2012-2019) public, shame-based trauma, which stemmed from my earthly father's secret criminal life.  Yes, my physical label was now the biological daughter of the criminal Ron Wilson, a liar, a deceiver, and a serial thief. The person I looked up to when I was younger, but who is now so unrecognizable to me. His secret life was that of being a con artist who orchestrated the largest Ponzi scheme in South Carolina history.

I am grateful that I chose to be a follower of God when I was a little girl because He has everything to do with guiding me at arriving at a solution to my problem - living a happy life as a CK. You see in His family, there is no social hierarchy, we are all on a level playing field, and He makes us feel important no matter how we've been viewed by others. It is easy for us to allow what others' think of us to be more important than what our Heavenly Father thinks of us because we can see, hear, and touch others. Not to mention, we spend so much time in thinking and communicating with them. Although we cannot see or touch God, we can still hear from Him. It is not an audible sound that we are familiar with, but it is much more than that. His voice is personable, positive, and persistent. It is found within those moments all throughout our day when we are thinking about and munching on His Word while learning how to keep on our Garments of Praise and enrobing others in their Garments of Praise.

So I don't look at being a CK through a common-sense or physical-thinking mindset that is shame driven, but I now look at being a CK through a spiritual thinking mindset that is praise driven. This boosts my self-confidence and restores my reputation! You see, my Heavenly Father allowed for me to be born into this exact family, and He knew that I would encounter this dark time in my middle-aged years. This gave me the opportunity to grow in my relationship with Him and study all about this powerful, spiritual Garment of Praise that always trumps the spirit of despair. I now know there is a differentiation between the two CK's (those that help their community and those that don't), and God sees me as a Jonathan CK and not as a Malchishua CK. Because He sees me this way, I can see myself this same way - in a positive light. 

But here is the catch: we have to get to a state of wanting and prizing His view of us more than others' view of us; this is the fuel that drives us to extinguish the feelings or thoughts of self-pity. His validation is important and powerful, which leads to us viewing a healthy state of ourselves. 

Friend, in order for this invisible relationship to be more powerful than any visible relationship that we have with others, we must keep our thoughts on His Word. It is not on a scripture verse per se, but actions from other godly people that we read about from the Bible. We implement those tips that brought them positivity and see it do the same in our lives. No matter how much we keep learning about how to keep on our Garments of Praise, there is always more to learn, especially about helping our community keep enrobed as well!